Jokes2Go daily best Humor for 12/14/2005

Dear humor lover, welcome to today's edition of JOKES2GO.COM's daily humor email!

Your dose of humor for today appears below, fresh-picked from today's daily humor issues:

YOUR JoKe:
----------

The first Jewish woman President is elected.
She calls her Mother: "Mama, I've won the elections,
you've got to come to the swearing-in ceremony."
"I don't know, what would I wear?"
"Don't worry, I'll send you a dressmaker"
"But I only eat kosher food"
"Mama, I am going to be the president, I can get you kosher food"
"But how will I get there?"
"I'll send a limo, just come mama"
"Ok, Ok, if it makes you happy.
The great day comes and Mama is seated between the Supreme Court
Justices and the Future Cabinet members, she nudges the gentleman
on her right. "You see that girl, the one with her hand on the Bible?"
.."Her brother's a doctor!"

YOUR StOrY:
-----------

On February 3, 1990, a Renton (Seattle area) man tried to commit
a robbery. This was probably his first attempt, as suggested by
his lack of a record of violent crime, and by his terminally stupid
choice:

1.The target was H&J Leather & Firearms, a gunshop;

2.The shop was full of customers, in a state where a substantial
fraction of the adult population is licensed to carry concealed
handguns in public places;

3.To enter the shop, he had to step around a marked King County
Police patrol car parked at the front door;

4.An officer in uniform was standing next to the counter, having
coffee before reporting to duty.

Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a holdup and
fired a few wild shots.
The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, removing him from the
gene pool.
Several other customers also drew their guns, but didn't fire.
No one else was hurt.

YOUR PoEm:
----------

There was an announcer named Herschel
Whose habits became controversial,
Because when out wooing
Whatever he was doing
At ten he'd insert his commercial.

YOUR QuOtE:
-----------

"I'd love to go out with you, but I want to spend more time with my blender."
-- Unknown

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